How can you help prevent sexual violence?
Challenge Victim Blaming
We can define this as someone saying, implying, or treating a person who has experienced harmful or abusive behaviour like it was a result of something they did or said, instead of placing the responsibility where it belongs: on the person who harmed them.
Examples of victim blaming may include
- “Were you drinking (alcohol)?”
- “What were you wearing?”
- “How hard did you try to stop it?”
- “Why didn’t you come tell anyone sooner?”
- “Why did you send the image in the first place?”
Blaming the survivor makes it more difficult for that person to tell someone or report what happened to them. On a societal level, it means fewer crimes are reported and fewer perpetrators are convicted. Victim blaming also reinforces problematic attitudes. It allows perpetrators to avoid being held accountable for their actions.
How can we combat victim blaming?
- Avoid using language that objectifies or degrades women.
- Speak out if you hear someone else making an offensive joke trivializing rape.
- Think critically about the media’s messages about women, men, relationships, and violence.
- Let survivors know that it is not their fault.
- Hold abusers accountable for their actions: do not let them make excuses like blaming the victim, alcohol, or drugs for their behaviour.
- Be an Active Bystander!
Be an Active Bystander
All of us are likely to be bystanders to events or incidents over our life, whether this be in person or online and all of us have the potential to be ‘active bystanders’. This is where we become aware of when someone’s behaviour is inappropriate or threatening and we choose to challenge it. Now, this doesn’t mean we have to play the ‘hero’, our safety must be priority.
However, we can challenge in a safe way. Safely intervening could mean anything from a disapproving look, interrupting or distracting someone, not laughing at a sexist or a violent joke. Talking to a friend about their behaviour in a non-confrontational way or caring for a friend who’s experienced problematic behaviour. Other times, it means asking friends, staff, or the police for help.
Research shows that bystander intervention can be an effective way of stopping sexual assault before it happens, as bystanders play a key role in preventing, discouraging, and/or intervening when an act of violence has the potential to occur.
Here are some things to consider:
Being an active bystander means being aware of when someone’s behaviour is inappropriate or threatening and choosing to challenge it. If you do not feel comfortable doing this directly, then get someone to help you such as a friend or someone in authority.
Before stepping in, try the ABC approach:
Assess for safety: If you see someone in trouble, ask yourself if you can help safely in any way. Remember, your personal safety is a priority – never put yourself at risk.
Be in a group: It’s safer to call out behaviour or intervene in a group. If this is not an option, report it to others who can act.
Care for the person. Talk to the person who you think may need help. Ask them if they are OK.
When you can intervene safely, here are some tips on what you could do. Remember the four Ds – direct, distract, delegate, delay.
Direct action
Call out negative behaviour, tell the person to stop or ask the person if they are OK. Do this as a group if you can. Be polite. Don’t aggravate the situation – remain calm and state why something has offended you. Stick to exactly what has happened, don’t exaggerate.
Distract
Interrupt, start a conversation with the person causing the harm to allow their potential target to move away or have friends intervene. Or come up with an idea to get the person out of the situation – tell them they need to take a call, or you need to speak to them; any excuse to get them away to safety.
Delegate
If you are too embarrassed or shy to speak out, or you don’t feel safe to do so, get someone else to step in. Most venues have a zero-tolerance policy on harassment, so the staff there will act.
Delay
If the situation is too dangerous to challenge then and there (such as there is the threat of violence or you are outnumbered) just walk away. Wait for the situation to pass then ask the person later if they are OK. Or report it when it’s safe to do so – it’s never too late to act.
Online
You can be an active bystander online by reporting inappropriate posts straight away to the social media platform.
